West Side Stories

A “source” tells me that there are some high jinx happening over in our Washington Highlands. It seems that adorable little Gnomes are popping up on doorsteps throughout the tony east side neighborhood. Without getting into a discussion of evolution versus creation, nobody seems to know from where these little fellas are sprouting. Is it a Travelocity promotion gone awry? Are they escapees from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry? If you know who’s behind these mini creative capers, do tell! E-mail me at westsidestoriestosa@yahoo.com .

According to a recent story on Channel 4 news, the most dangerous intersection in Southeast Wisconsin is in Wauwatosa. According to that report, the intersection at Highway 45 and Capitol Drive is the most dangerous, followed by Highway 45 and Silver Spring and Barker and Bluemound Road. I’ve driven through all of these intersections many times, and I can vouch for the fact that you’d better be on your toes when you’re driving there. I find it a little hard to believe that ours is #1, but I guess somebody had to be in first place.

This got me thinking, there are a few other spots where driving in Tosa is challenging. North Avenue on a Saturday or a rush hour evening is plain crazy. There’s virtually no sense trying to turn left onto North Avenue from a side street during those times, unless you have hours to waste.

The traffic on Highway 100 through Wauwatosa almost keeps pace with the traffic on Highway 45. And still, it goes nowhere fast. And it will only get busier when the new Best Buy opens across the street from Mayfair Mall.

Driving through the village is always a bit tricky, primarily because of the number of pedestrians that you’ll encounter there. I think the trick is to just slow down and you’ll get to your destination in plenty of time.

Another spot that has always concerned me is the intersection of 88th and North. If you’re approaching it from the north, people seem to have different ideas of where their cars should be. If I’m proceeding straight through, I stay far to the right, because it’s a more direct route. However, I’ve had people pull along side me on the left and then go straight, which becomes dangerous. I’ve also seen many, many people run the red lights at that intersection. Needless to say, I always look both ways before crossing North Avenue.

What about you? Which intersections or streets do you think are dangerous? Are there any that you avoid? Where would you like to see more police presence to avoid collisions or dangerous speeders? E-mail me at westsidestoriestosa@yahoo.com and let me know.

So apparently there was a memo sent out to all parents recently and it read something like this: “It is now time to BUY ALL OF YOUR SCHOOL SUPPLIES IMMEDIATELY!” People, it is not even August 1st. No schools are open yet. The floors have not yet been buffed. The chairs and desks are still piled high in the hallways. There won’t be anybody barfing in the nurse’s office for at least a month, but here in Wauwatosa, school supply shopping has become the official summer pastime.

That’s all well and good. I’m all for getting a jump on things. I’m notoriously early for virtually everything, but there’s nothing to put a damper on summer fun faster than a trip to Target to buy school supplies.

The problem with this annual buying frenzy is the complete lack of school supply buying etiquette. First of all, they should give us skinny carts or a personal Sherpa. They don’t. The carts are large and the aisles aren’t. Then, they should collect all cell phones and children before you are allowed to enter the school supply zone. Because, to use an educational analogy: Mom + supply list + children (multiply by 2 if they are toddlers) + cell phone + cart = complete and utter chaos.

This year our job was easier. It’s my daughter’s first year of high school and Crayola Fine Tip Bold Colors 24 pack Markers are not on our list. (Thank God!) Her requirements are simple and somewhat open-ended. Nevertheless, we ventured to Target knowing that if we waited 3 weeks, everything left over would look lame, which, in the mind of a teenager is tantamount to social suicide.

So back to these manners-lacking moms. Look, we all expect crowds and a bit of bumping into each other and perhaps a few items that are out of stock. No biggie. But it doesn’t help matters when parents' carts are parked diagonally blocking everyone, their kids are wandering aimlessly and whining and they are on the cell phone gossiping with their girlfriends. Seriously!

I truly wish that mass merchants would employ School Supply *** whose sole purpose is to yell at the slow-thinkers, the picky-choosers and those not truly committed to the task at hand. “C’MON PEOPLE, MOVE IT! LADY, PICK A RULER, YOUR KID DOESN’T CARE WHAT COLOR IT IS. SIR, YOUR CHILD IS ALREADY EATING THE ERASERS, PLEASE LEAVE THE AREA. YOUNG LADY, YOUR BOYFRIEND WON’T BE LOOKING AT YOUR NOTEBOOKS – TRUST ME!”

I know, I’m preaching to the choir here. You people are all well-behaved, make your decisions quickly and don’t take along kids that do not want to be there, right? If not, allow me to introduce you to a wonderful new concept: Buying Online. Yes, you can talk on the phone, coddle your children, consider your choices and dawdle to your heart’s content. Brilliant, isn’t it?

What do you think about school supply shopping? Are you glad that it starts so early or do you wish we could wait longer? E-mail me about this or any other topic at westsidestoriestosa@yahoo.com .

I’m not afraid to admit that I love to shop. If there’s a new store in Tosa, you’ll see me there within the first month. I love new retail and all of the freshness and hope and enthusiasm that comes with it. Which is why I also have to confess to my relationship with Mayfair Mall. Since I live within a mile or two of our mall, I’m there a lot. Sometimes once a day. Sometimes, even more. I have teenagers, so on some days, you’ll find several members of our family roaming the tiled floors, catching a movie, dining or perhaps just browsing.

I understand that some people are not as fond of Mayfair and the giant behemoth into which it has grown, and that’s OK. They loathe the holiday crowds and the traffic congestion they cause and the potential problems that arise from a place being so darn popular. Me? I love it all and I fondly watch as it evolves. As an example, I planned an entire day around the opening of Crate & Barrel. Sad, isn’t it?

You see, Mayfair and I go way back. Not as far back as many native Tosans, but I remember it when it was actually quaint. In fact, one of my fondest memories was watching the ice skaters on my lunch hour while my OB/GYN office upstairs processed my first pregnancy test. (Yes, it used to take longer than 5 minutes.) Back then, I hoped that I’d one day be able to bring my kids to Mayfair to skate, but it was not to be. Mayfair had big plans, and they didn’t involve ice.

I remember parking way in the back of the mall and going to the movies, back when the Mayfair Theatre had a whopping TWO screens in a separate building. It was a sad day when they tore that down. I watched as Mayfair transformed from a tiny, quirky mostly one-story mall into a real shopping destination with, gasp!, a food court and a mega-plex movie theater!

I watched as they added a second floor and soon stores that I only knew through catalogs or heard about from friends became Mayfair anchors – Williams-Sonoma, Pottery Barn, Brighton Collectibles, Build-A-Bear, The Apple Store, American Eagle, Sephora. It felt like our small town was sort of growing up and getting a slice of the American dream. Sure, there were growing pains along the way, but from my perspective, Mayfair has done a pretty good job of working with the public and addressing concerns as they arise. We often forget that, at least for now, Mayfair is the best shopping mall in all of Wisconsin.

Mayfair’s not perfect. I hate the new straight-on parking in the back of Marshall Field’s - it’s hard to get in and out of. Navigating your car from Barnes & Noble to the Cheesecake Factory is like driving an obstacle course. Spencer Gifts and its semi-porn merchandise could go away anytime soon, in my opinion. And there’s no Old Navy. I hate that I have to drive to Brookfield for something that we should have here!

Still, despite its few negatives, I’m sticking with Mayfair. Yes, on some days it will drive me crazy and I may go visit Brookfield Square, but I’ll always come back to Mayfair. Now, if we could only get that ice rink back.....

And here we thought we were the only ones with this idea. It was hot yesterday. Very hot. (Yes, I know this is news to many of you.) We do have air conditioning, but still, I used the heat as my excuse. That, accompanied by an overnight visitor and teen children whose dinner plans changed by the minute, was a good enough reason to head out to dinner. My poor husband, who had skipped lunch, arrived home to find no gourmet meal simmering on the stove. (Let me clarify: He has never come home to a gourmet meal simmering on the stove, unless it was prepared by someone else.) Still, he’s always an agreeable soul and he suggested that Cheesecake Factory might be the best destination for us.

We have a system in our family. If we go out to dinner where there might be a wait, one person jumps out of the car, heads to the hostess stand, asks about the wait time and if it’s under our maximum, puts our name on the list. Last night we pulled up to The Cheesecake Factory and opened the door. It was mobbed. Still, you never know. So we asked at the hostess stand and the friendly woman said it would be “10 or 20 minutes.” Our maximum was 30 minutes, so this was fine. Being the restaurant waiting veterans, we knew to expect the 20 more than the 10.

Fast forward 20 minutes. The lobby of the restaurant was getting more crowded by the second. After being jabbed countless times by too many Kate Spades, Pradas and Coaches, my husband started commenting on purses being classified as weapons. Our buzzer thingy was still not vibrating. I checked at the desk and the hostess apologized and said it would be just 5 or 10 more minutes. And it was. 30 total minutes, until we got to our table, which really wasn’t clean and had to be “re-set” while we stood nearby waiting.

If you’re thinking that my story ends badly, it doesn’t. Our meal was really quite good, as was the service. I have to tell you that they have something pretty good going at The Cheesecake Factory. Yes, the waits are long and sometimes crowded, the portions could feed a third world country and are pricey, but the staff is extremely well trained in handling overheated, impatient customers deftly. You wouldn’t call it intimate dining, but on a ghastly hot evening, it was a great way to relax and enjoy some good food. But if you do decide to head to "The Factory," for the sake of those around you, you might want to bring your small designer purse.

Hands down, the thing that I love most about Wauwatosa is our proximity to practically everything. My husband likes to say that, with few exceptions, we’re 10 minutes from anywhere. That is, of course, an exaggeration, but we’re so spoiled by our location, I think we often take it for granted.

If we decide, at the last minute, to go to a Brewer game at Miller Park, we’re there in scant minutes, and that includes stopping on Bluemound to buy peanuts from the peanut guy. (Who, by the way, throws in baseball bubble gum with every $3 bag.) Tell that to a Cubs fan and they’ll groan, knowing that a trip to Wrigley Field is a 2-hour jaunt, each way, on a good day. No wonder they’re driving up here for games, they’re actually closer!

The Zoo? Five minutes, unless it’s Zoo a la Carte weekend. Summerfest? 15 minutes, except for the July 3rd Big Bang. Catching a game at the Bradley Center? I recommend city streets (the new Vliet Street Bridge will practically take you to the front door) to get you there in 20 minutes, unless playoffs, March Madness or bad weather intervene. State Fair? 10 minutes, as long as you figured out the traffic pattern and aren’t heading south on 84th street. (Heck, if you live in Ravenswood, you can walk to the fairgrounds, something unheard of in Illinois!)

What makes our location so ideal is that we can often avoid the freeway. In the midst of the Marquette Interchange Project, this is a huge advantage. Not to mention the fact that we get to get an up-close view of our neighboring communities, instead of driving by them at 50 mph.

The only negative aspect of Tosa being close to so much is that we’re starting to get a little...well, impatient. When our streets are under construction and we have to wait in line for a train, or a dump truck or to turn left at a stoplight, we tend to become antsy and wonder what’s taking so long. Next time that happens, imagine yourself on I-43 at Walnut, driving home to Mequon. Suddenly that delay on State Street doesn’t seem so irritating, does it?

If you’ve lived in Wauwatosa for any amount of time, you know that in some areas, parking is at a premium. There are certain places where, if you arrive at the wrong time, you will most certainly end up doing what I call the “Circle, Lurk and Park.” This means that you drive slowly, lurk in hopes that someone will be leaving soon and, if successful, eventually park in a much coveted spot.

One such destination is Drew’s Variety Store at around 3:15 pm on a weekday during the school year. And, if you’re unlucky to be a victim of Murphy’s Law, it will be a day when your child is in desperate need of a poster board and you have 5 minutes to get that child to some other appointment. At that time of day, there are precious few angled parking spaces near Drew’s and I, for one, have spent a few minutes circling the block past Bartolotta’s and Noodles, coming back in hopes that someone has left or lurking while a young mother with children in tow loads up her minivan. I know, I know, there are lots of parking spaces across the street behind Swan Interiors, but using them would mean that I’d actually have to cross the street and walk uphill to Drew’s – gasp!

Another place where you’ll see Circle, Lurk and Park in full operation is at Mayfair Mall, under the AMC Theatres during inclement weather. I’m completely guilty of making several passes before finally parking outside and walking the extra 20 yards, which I really should be doing since I’m usually about to consume sizeable quantities of popcorn and candy.

Yesterday, I found another “skimpy” parking situation over at the new City Market on North Avenue. As I mentioned in my June 26th post, this new eatery and bakery is finally open and already very popular. At around 12:30 pm yesterday, we also discovered that parking spaces were few and despite doing a Circle, Lurk and Park, we’d have to resort to street parking on Ludington or Jackson Park. Instead, we opted to go somewhere else. I don’t think we hurt City Market’s business for doing that, but I’m hoping that others won’t follow my poor example. Judging by the crowds on the patio, I think they’ll be just fine.

A few other challenging parking destinations are Balistreri’s on 68th and Wells, Sendik’s on a crowded weekend, the orthodontist office on 88th & North, Starbucks in the village, Wisconsin Garden & Pet in late spring and The Rosebud Theatre if you arrive right before the movie starts. I’ve seen many others doing the Circle, Lurk and Park at these locations, often successfully.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining. This so-called parking problem wouldn’t even register in the minds of most New Yorkers that are accustomed to walking 10 blocks to get a decaf latte. I realize that walking to and from our fine village is something I should do much more often.

How about you? Do you Circle, Lurk and Park or do you hop on your Schwinn or slip on your Birkenstocks and walk up or down to your favorite village destination? Do you wish we had more parking or are you thankful that much of our Village hasn’t fallen victim to urban sprawl? Feel free to e-mail me on this or any other topic at westsidestoriestosa@yahoo.com . I’d love to hear from you!

It’s not really difficult to find a beer or a drink in Wauwatosa. Like most Wisconsin communities, we have our fair share of bars and liquor stores. However, until recently, a place to sit “al fresco” and sip wine has been a bit trickier to locate or required a pricey meal at Bartolotta’s.

Thanks to Vino 100, on the corner of Underwood Avenue in the Village, we now have a relaxing and affordable destination to enjoy the warm weather while drinking a glass of wine. Although it’s been open since last November, this is a great time to visit our newest and only wine bar that features 100 great wines for $25 or less.

At Vino 100, you can purchase a reasonably-priced bottle of wine to share with friends, or just a glass or two to enjoy on your own, and sit on their lovely patio that is carved out behind and below Starbucks in the village. And if you’re hungry, you can even order appetizers from Bartolotta’s (from 5:30 – 9:00 pm) and enjoy the ambient music that’s piped in around you. What a great way to unwind after a long week – just sit back on a Friday evening and watch the traffic whiz by as you sip on a lightly chilled glass of Chardonnay.

And if you’re not a wine connoisseur, the friendly and helpful staff can assist you in finding a wine that’s just right for you without making you feel embarrassed. All in all, it’s a really pleasant, and very un-bar like atmosphere that has been long overdue in our emerging village.

I’ve tried to be patient. I’ve tried to be kind. I’ve tried to remember what it was like when I was in that time of my life. After all, it was only 10+ years ago, but it seems like a lifetime. Still, I feel the same. Something must be done. Baby strollers and mothers have gotten out of hand.

When my children were babies, our stroller was average size. Sure I loaded it up with lots of unnecessary junk (would I really need to change them 4 times in an afternoon?) and hung a diaper bag on it that was so heavy it outweighed the baby. Nevertheless, we’d head to Mayfair Mall on a weekend and people could actually pass us in the food court or even the mall corridors.

Have you seen strollers lately? These things are practically SUVs with toddlers in them! The tires are larger than my first Schwinn. There are more cupholders on them than my minivan. What is up with the double-wides and the jogging strollers?! Are these women expecting to do some off-road travel with their tot in tow? Darn it all….they’re hogging the aisles and slowing down my shopping expedition.

My favorite stroller encounter is at Sendik's Foods. Since Sendik's is a small store, it's a great place to stop in a pick up a few essentials or last-minute items. It is there that I often run into moms and their giant strollers with a few kids dangling from the back. This is no problem at 8:00 or 9:00 am on a weekday when the store is quiet. At 5:00 pm or on Saturday or Sunday, it is not a good situation at all.

It would be fine if there were just a few of these in a metropolitan area. But everyone has one. They’re huge and they’re taking over a mall near you. And worst of all, they’re driven by moms that don’t have a clue that anyone else is around. You know these women. They’re the ones driving around town with a cell phone in one hand, a decaf latte in the other and passing out juice boxes while veering all over the road! Get these women in Mayfair with a stroller and a herd of toddlers and they think they own the place. One of her children has a meltdown? No problem…they just stop in the middle of the aisle while they sweetly plead with their little tyke. Can’t decide what to feed the kiddies for lunch at the food court? No problem….just park the stroller right in front of the busiest food establishment and discuss the options.

And here’s the best part….these moms travel in packs! That’s right, just when you think that one of these moms is annoying…..they get together with 4 or 5 of their friends and their friends’ kids. And they have that pack mentality. Their needs come way ahead of yours. Who cares if you’re on your lunch hour or have to pick up carpool in 15 minutes. Their babies are hungry and they need time and space to consider the choices! Never mind the fact that their five strollers are blocking any and all access to food or tables.

If you own and operate one of these strollers – great. I’m sure it’s fabulous and I hope you enjoy your child's early years because they go by quickly. But realize that there are other people around. Share the road and the aisles and we’ll all get along really well. I’ll even smile at your child and pick up that tippy cup that he threw at me.

I love fireworks. I love them because when they explode above you, they’re huge. They’re loud and so much larger than life, or seemingly so. I love the concussion of sound that echoes off buildings and shakes you to your very core. I love that there is absolutely no way to duplicate them or replay them. Watching them on TV is so disappointing that it should be against the law. No sirree. It’s the real thing or nothing at all. And to me, the best fireworks are smaller shows were you can be up close and smell the smoke and see the sparks, much like it’s always been in Wauwatosa.

Last night, being the 4th of July, we Tosans were treated to our annual Independence Day fireworks display. After a day that included a crowd-pleasing parade, picnics and various celebratory activities, lots of us headed to Wauwatosa West High School for fireworks. Or, at least, that’s where we thought we were headed. When my husband and I arrived, (after our teenage daughter successfully separated herself from us), we were about to follow the crowd headed behind Tosa West. Then we heard a man ask a police officer where the fireworks were being launched. “Oh, they’re shooting them off at Whitman, straight up in the air,” said the officer. Since we were just barely past the footbridge over Hwy 45, we decided to head over toward Whitman to get a little closer vantage point.

So we parked our lawn chairs and our blankets facing east on a hill overlooking the tennis courts and sports fields surrounding Whitman Middle School. It was an outstanding view, probably the best available. (I have to say, still not as spectacular as Hart Park, but a good substitute, nonetheless.) Still, it made me wonder. The people that were over at Tosa West were quite a bit back from the launch point of the fireworks. If they had been given the choice, would they have preferred to be with us over at Whitman, instead of gazing across Hwy 45? There was plenty of room over at Whitman even though there were several hundred of us that discovered this secret spot. Why was it that all information online and in print said that the fireworks were at Wauwatosa West? Did they think that we would be confused knowing that the events during the day were at the high school but the fireworks were at the middle school?

If there’s one thing I know about Wauwatosans, it’s that they’re quite good at navigating. Anyone that has given directions to a destination in the Village can attest to that. I haven’t yet heard any complaints about the fireworks venue shift, but I can’t help but think that a few fireworks devotees were a little miffed to be set further back from the launch site than expected. So my only recommendation to our city officials is that next year, wherever the fireworks are really being launched, let us know. We can handle it and we promise not to park our lawn chairs past the yellow police tape. Wherever that is.

During my years in Wauwatosa, I’ve seen several businesses come and go. Some, like Heinrich’s Bakery, were legendary. Others, like Soprano’s Subs (ironically in Heinrich’s former space), were here and gone, practically before we got to know them. Still, memory is usually short and we tend to move on and find a replacement pretty quickly. The exception to this is Shamrock Video.

If you lived anywhere near 89th and North during the 1990s, you were probably familiar with Shamrock Video. This small store, next to Netzow’s Pianos on the south side of North Avenue, was the place to go to rent VHS videotapes (no DVDs yet). It was a tiny space that became even tinier on Friday and Saturday nights when everyone in the neighborhood would be there. We’d venture over there with our toddlers in tow in search of a movie that could entertain both parents and kids. After making our selection, we’d often head across the street to ***’s to pick up a carry-out dinner to satisfy everyone. (Did you know that ***’s makes kid-pleasing cheeseburgers?!)

A trip to Shamrock was like visiting a town square. Adults would meet up with friends. Parents would compare notes on which movies were worth the price of rental or which titles were more violent than advertised. Kids would make choices from the limited selection of videogames, often getting tips from other kids that had already tested them. The Shamrock staff was always willing to give you an opinion on a movie or recommend a different title if you weren’t sure what you wanted. And no video rental would be complete without a selection of cheap candy that was sold at the counter. It was small-town America at its very best. Sure, it was tough to find a new movie, especially on a weekend, but it was a quaint little corner of our world that was good enough for us.

Today, our video rental choices are Hollywood Video on 68th and State and Blockbuster on 61st and North. If there’s another choice, I haven’t heard about it. Sure, these two national chains offer more titles than the average family could rent in a year, but it’s just not the same. I rarely see anyone I know in these stores and, frankly, the employees look like they wish they were elsewhere. Strange as it sounds, I miss the limited selection and the hominess of Shamrock Video. Sometimes smaller is just better.